Nothing prepares you for "Mom Guilt"

     I actually felt guilty for giving my little Landry green beans.  He LOVES them.  The very first time he tried them, he gobbled them up.  However, a few hours later, he got gassy.  I didn't contribute his gassiness to just greenbeans, I mean come on, if you have a baby, or even just been around a baby, you know how much they toot.  It could have been the formula he is supplemented with, or it could have even been something I ate and then he ingested while nursing, I do eat my fair share of raw broccoli ya know?.  So...whatever...**shrugs it off**.  We tried green beans again the next week.  Welp, we know for sure now, the green beans are probably giving him gas.  And because I hand fed him the toot producing puree, I felt like crap.  It's my fault he's uncomfortable, how could I not feel like crap. 
  
     What I want every mother to hear that is reading this, and yes I need to re-read this and take this advice myself, is seriously stop blaming yourself.   First of all, do you know how good green beans are for you?  Let's see, green beans rank very low on the list of foods that prompt any type of allergic reaction and they aren't on the "dirty dozen" list of foods highly contaminated with pesticides.  The many nutrients in green beans can help you prevent a number of different conditions, including Alzheimer's, atherosclerosis, diabetic heart disease, colon cancer, asthma, arthritis, acne, ear infections, and maybe even colds and flu’s.  But even with all that positive information I laid out, his couple of farts made me feel like *gasp* a bad mother.
   
     I'm an awesome mom, if not for anything other than feeling like a bad mother for giving their child nutricious food.  I need to remember that, dammit!  Learning these things, like what food gives your baby gas, allergic reactions, or tummy aches is part of the deal in trying out new foods.  What can ya do?  It's not like your baby is going to eat breastmilk/formula for the rest of his life. 

     Don't get me started on how guilty I feel for having my son in daycare while I go to work.  Do you have any idea how much I miss him during the day?  I think of him, literally every single second that I'm not with him.  So when my son cries in the middle of the night, more than once, do I let him cry it out?  Hell no I don't!  He doesn't get me at all during the day, why would I let him cry for me at night time when I'm readily available to him?  Tired? Yes, I'm exhausted, but I'm available to him, and if he wants me, he gets me. 

     Breast milk vs Formula....aye yai yai.  The list could go on of things us mothers feel guilt over.  I felt guilty when my milk supply started to dwindle.  He's still getting breast milk, which is more than I could say for what I thought he was going to get.  When I was pregnant, I said to myself, if I can breast feed with no issues on my end, and no issues on his, then I will do it, no matter how tired it makes me or how demanding his feeding schedule is.  And I'm still doing it, so why do I feel bad if my body is just producing less, when I haven't done anything to make myself produce less?  It is what it is.  Landry is 5 months old and he's gotten breast milk every single day since he was born.  I need to be grateful that I am able to still nurse him and stop dwelling on the fact that I might be producing less than I was the day before.  All good things come to an end eventually.

    I swear, one day I will pat myself on the back and say, "You're doing great."  Until I can do that for myself, I think it's really important to encourage other mothers in the same way, tell your best friend, your sister, your aunt, your co-worker, and especially your own mother, that she is an amazing mother and efforts are noticed.