I thought with all the positive blogs I've been posting lately, it might come across that I'm happy 24/7 and everything is peachy all the time. Well, that's not possible. We all have bad days, and don't get it twisted, when I have a bad day, I'm really thrown off. And it takes me a couple of hours to shake it off, sometimes it takes me going to bed and waking up with a fresh attitude. Just yesterday I had a pretty hard day. I woke up with a headache after getting very little sleep because Landry was fussy all night (I think he's having a growth spurt?). Anyway, I woke up feeling pretty crappy (physically). And then I saw somtething on my facebook feed that hit a nerve. The post made me feel either left out or like I was being talked about behind my back. Either way, it wasn't a good feeling. Then that in turn made me angry and wishing I was at home with Landry, which in turn made me feel guilty that he was at daycare. It was a snowball effect of bad feelings. And for some reason, I felt like I didn't have control or the strength to stop it. After I got home, I was exhausted from the day I had and I was trying to get dinner ready for my husband who had to leave for his second job 30 minutes after arriving home from his first...oh and also throw in the fact that Landry had to get a bath around the same time. So it was hectic and it ended up that his dinner didn't get done on time (it was chicken, and you can't mess around with chicken that's not done all the way). So he left with an empty belly and that made me feel really bad. He was able to stop and pick up dinner, but still. Then, Landry went down like a dream. So peaceful, sleepily rubbing his eyes, he took a bottle and passed out in his crib. After eating dinner and cleaning up and getting Landry's stuff ready for the next day (bottles, clothes, etc) I was able to relax for a little on the couch with my pups. It's my most peaceful time of the day if/when I get time to do that. I should have been cleaning our bedroom, my vanity especially, rushing around in the morning has left it looking like a 3rd graders art desk. I felt guilt because I wasn't making the most of my time. My dogs ended up tipping over their metal food bowl on ceramic tile floor making a huge CRASH, waking up Landry, who was a bear to put back down. All of it was coming to a head. I felt out of control. And realistically, nothing really terrible even happened. It was just the culmination of a bad day and I felt like I was about to explode. I held on to my patience long enough to get Landry back to sleep. Once he was asleep I went back downstairs and let the dogs out to use the bathroom before bedtime. It wasn't until they were outside when I finally let go of everything I was feeling that day and cried. I call these my learning days. Because instead of letting it get to that point I could have seeked God the second I woke up with my headache. I could have prayed right then and there and asked God to help me through this day and to help me carry the burdens because I wasn't feeling great. I should have asked him to help me see all the positive aspects of the day and to ignore the negative ones. And I see this all now (hindsight is always 20/20, am I right?) But because I see this now, I'll know better for next time. What it also has shown me is that there truly is a lesson in every day we are given. Yesterday, my lessons were plenty...
1) If you wake up with a headache, don't wait until noon to take motrin.
2) If you feel like something on social media affects you negatively, remove yourself from it. Also within that, specifically in my situation, remember that the less you care about what others think of you, the happier you will be. What matters is what God thinks and how you reflect His love in handling the situation.
3) If you feel like you are reaching a level of stress that isn't healthy, take the time to remove yourself from the situation and pray. I should have done this multiple times throughout the day, but I made time for everything and everyone else when I should have so clearly just made time for God.
4) If something bothers you, just speak up. Dont' hold it in to bubble up inside of you. Confront the person that offended you or hurt you. If you're scared to, ask God to help you through that. Because in the end of it all, it doesn't matter what other people think of you. You could be the brightest, juicest peach in the bunch, but there is always going to be someone out there that hates peaches.
I just wanted you all to know that I'm NOT perfect, life isn't always easy breezy...some days can really throw me for a loop. But there is a difference in recognizing that a bad day does not equal a bad life. I hope you all are seeing the blessings God put in your life today and thanking Him for always having your best at heart. I know I am.
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